Oh Provo. How you feel like home already

I'm HOME!!!! I love being back with Brittani!! We've done tons of fun stuff. We even have a swimming pool :) Yay for that right?

The slightly less fun thing about being back? Like there is one. ok yes there is. I broke everything off with Brad. We're still friends, but I made it clear that I was probably going to go on dates down here, and that I think he needs to concentrate on his mission while I concentrate on school. It sucks hard core though. I feel like a crappy person for hurting him, and it hurt me too. I went to Time Traveler's Wife today with my Brittani and Erin. I love that movie so much, but I started sobbing quietly towards the end **SPOILER ALERT** when he said "I know, but I don't want you to wait for me. I love you." That really just hit home.

ANYWHO...proof that the Carmike sucks you in and never lets go of you...I just finished filling out an application and disclosure form for...The Carmike Wynnsong 12 theater!! yay me!! I'm going to go turn it in tomorrow...then go in for the interview in nice black pants, a white button up shirt...and possibly my nametag from Pocatello. haha.

BTW...Brittani starts work tomorrow, so I'm going to be lonely. Anyone in Provo want to do something???

Rambling Wonders

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to live at the zoo? I have. It doesn't seem like somewhere that I could be happy. I was at the zoo today, and all of the animals seemed so unhappy. They seemed bored with life...and not the there's nothing to do bored...just the I don't care about life bored. Their cages all seemed way to small, and I just felt for all of them. I took a picture of the Canadian Lynx...which believe it or not was one of the more energetic animals there. But when I really started thinking about it, I started to wonder if I would be able to be happy there. I don't hold still very well, and I hate having nothing to do...but I can find something to do most places. I'm pretty good at finding ways to be happy no matter where I am. I think I would get annoyed with all the people coming and staring at me, but since I've always been a small town girl, isn't that kind of like my own kind of confining cage? One that I love and wouldn't trade--I love the small town and being able to see people I know everywhere--but still a sort of cage...a safety net even.

I got to talk to Kacy Ann today. That was amazing!! I love that girl, and I have missed her a ton. She still insists that she was a bad roommate, and although she wasn't perfect, no one is, and I think she was exactly what I needed at that point in my life.

What I genuinely cannot wait for is living with Jana. She is so much fun, and I am way excited to live with her. Everyone reading this who doesn't know Jana, just accept my word for it that your life is incredibly lacking, and if you don't ever get to meet her, you may as well have not lived. She is definitely another sign of how Heavenly Father watches out for me...how else would I get such an incredible roommate?

And I get to live with Brittani!!! Yay for best friends!! I feel closer to her than ever lately. She is the best friend on Earth...and everyone who hasn't met her...you may as well just go slit your wrists now. You really have nothing to live for besides the hope of someday meeting my amazing and beautiful best friend.

This will be an amazing semester. I need to remember why I'm going to be in Provo though. My classes aren't going to be easy. I have Biology, Psychology, Psych Stats, World Civilization to 1500, New Testament, Healthy Living, and Social Dance. And to everyone else in the world, Social Dance sounds like it will just be a constant party and a super easy class...but I am the world's second biggest klutz, have never been able to dance, and am well known for stepping on my partners toes...when we're just doing the circle sway. But I am excited. We're required to take some excersize like classes, and this qualifies as one. And I've always wanted to be graceful and be able to dance. I guess we'll see what I can do. I'll be doing a full 2 more credit hours than I did last semester, and I'm taking harder classes. So wish me luck all, and if I seem to be having too much fun, slap me across the face and remind me why I'm in Provo living with these amazing girls.

also...Brad promised me a pet giraffe someday. I plan to hold him to that. I really want a giraffe. and a bobcat. they're really cute.

The Church is True, The Book is Blue

A quick picture with Patty in honor of my last day at work

So about 3 weeks ago I was in my Sunday school class, and we werelearning about the premortal life. I'm in the mission prep class, so generally things get tied into missionary work. The teacher said something that really got me to thinking. He told us that his mission president always told him to think of everyone he met as the person who kept him faithful in the pre-existance. because really, think about it. Obviously because we're on Earth, we stayed faithful in the premortal life, but we probably didn't do it on our own. I'm sure we struggled with the decision. I can still see so much appeal in Satan's plan. I would still make the same decision because I am a firm believer in the importance of making our own decisions, but the thought of having all of my family together forever for sure couldn't be more appealing to me. I pray every night that at least my children will be faithful so that I can have my children and my spouse with me forever even if I won't have my siblings and parents. So who did keep me faithful? Who was it that encouraged me to make the right choice? For all I know, it was some stranger in Siberia...or it could have been Brittani, Brad, even Jade. It could be anyone. And how can I not return the favor? So with that added in with everything else, I chose to give a Book of Mormon to my dear friend Pat. I went and bought it, then I wrote my testimony inside of it and also wrote a letter to him to make sure he knows that no matter what, his friendship means the world to me, and that I just want him to be happy.

About a week later, I finally got up the courage to give it to him. I kept reciting to myself the quote that my friend Spencer had as his facebook status: "Really, sharing the gospel should be just as easy as giving out free money." and I asked myself, if I had a friend who was in desperate need of money, and I had extra money sitting around...just for that purpose even...would I hesitate to at least give it to that friend? Of course not. And I could see Pat's need for the gospel everytime I looked at him. So I realized that despite the risk of offending Pat, I was being a worse friend for not sharing what I had for him. So I took it to work with me, and I gave it to him as I got off work along with the letter. Much to my delight, he was not insulted at all, and it didn't change our friendship at all. He told me the next day that he is keeping the book in his car. I started praying that he would find it there after a rough day and decide to read it. He is truly such a strong and amazing person that I knew he would feel something, and it could only help him.

Today was my last day of work, and much to my suprise, before I left Pat told me that he had been reading it, and that he had pulled out his old copy from when he was 8 years old, and that he had read all of his favorite stories again. I was so excited, and so happy for him. I can't even explain the joy that I felt inside over it. Seeing signs of happiness in him, and distinctive changes-he's always censored himself around me, but I had a friend tell me that she had noticed him censoring himself around everyone lately-just lights up my day. I adore him, and would honestly do ANYTHING to make him happy, and the thought that he could finally be learning how amazing he is, and how to be truly happy makes me happier than I think most anything else could.

After this experience, I wonder to myself why anyone would not want to serve a mission. It feels so good to be able to share this truth in my life with someone. I know you can't try to share it with just anyone. I know that most of my friends from the theater wouldn't be interested, and wouldn't touch the book...they might even be insulted. But that's because their need isn't as deep as Pat's was at the time. I can't describe how it feels to help someone like that. I want to share that feeling with everyone. I got a letter from my friend Lucas who is on his mission just today, and I think he worded it amazingly well when he said: "Missionary work is some of the hardest and most rewarding work I've ever done. It's great to see how the Lord uses us from day to day to accomplish his work." I really couldn't say it better myself. I can't wait to get out there and be able to focus all my energy on serving the Lord, and bring my brothers and sisters back home to see our Father. Because that is really what missionary work is about.

My testimony is stronger right now than ever. I am so grateful to have the gospel in my life. It does so much for me!! I'm just going to wrap up with one more quote from Lucas' letter: "The church is true the Book is Blue!"

Awkward Phone conversations

So my phone rings the other day, and when I answer it's my older sister. I'm not super close to her for a number of reasons, so she mostly only calls when she wants something from me, so I was reluctant to talk to her.

She told me that she had an important question for me, and asked me what I would do if she decided to start dating girls. I was pretty confused since she had just gotten married. She told me that if anything happened to Corey, she didn't want to go back to dating guys, so she would probably go lesbian. I was kinda confused, but I told her that it's her life, not mine.

I just thought I would share this random story with you my dear blog readers.

also, I stopped at the theater with my BFF today, and we were talking to our manager Joshy, and Dale while they painted on the window, and Britt asked what colour they were going to paint something, and I said "black, like my soul." Joshy laughed and said "Tiffany, your soul isn't black. It's like a fruity pink." So since that second I have been fascinated with the concept of soul colours. I don't know if I think mine would be pink. I'm leaning in the direction of a sage green. Kinda warm and comforting...I don't know. what do you think?

P.S. I have some friends who have gotten married in the last year or so...and a couple in the past couple months, and I just barely looked up all their pictures...I love wedding pictures, so if any of my friends want to get married, I'm totally good with that so I can creep stalk their photos.