ratings

I am an avid reader of Mormon Bachelor Pad. I was very very team Jake...until he broke up with Andrea...I didn't care too much about the break up...okay, yes I did, but it wasn't a deal breaker. I still liked him a lot. But since the break up, he has become a jerk. I still want to be friends with him, but Calvin has been becoming someone I want to be friends with more and more while Jake loses my respect a little more each post. I talked with Calvin on facebook once, and I do now have to admit to having an e-crush on him. He's hilarious, fun, and incredibly flirtatious. I am a fan.

Anyway, they did a new post today for Christmas, in which they publicly rated some girls. I don't know how I feel about this...I mean, I don't care that they did it. It was highly entertaining to read, and I admire their honesty. and the courage of the girls. That's what I don't know about. I feel kind of like a coward, because although I really do wonder what kind of a rating I would get, I didn't have the courage to ask for a private rating, much less a public one. I can't imagine putting something that I'm so insecure about out there for so many people to read. I couldn't bring myself to honestly request the for real rating. I want to know...but at the same time I don't. If I don't ask, then I get to live with the hope in my mind that my rating would come out as a 6 or a 7. But I don't think it would. probably a 4 or 5. I hope.

Other than that...I HATE bitter self-absorbed teen girls. You know the ones I mean. The pretty plastic blondes with the Utah poof? The ones who talk behind other people's backs, and crush them. Yes, I am a hypocrite, because I am posting it behind these girls' backs right now...but they don't know me, and I will not use names. Just know, these girls have crushed one of my best friends whom I have spent a very long time trying to convince him how wonderful he is. These wretched little girls have made him doubt all of his worth...by talking about him behind his back, which of course got back to him. I want nothing more than to be able to take him away from where people will hurt him...but I don't know how or what to do to help him.

Single Girl Swag

I was driving home from spending the day with my BFF, and the song Goodbye by Kristina Debarge came on. I was listening to the chorus and can I just say AMEN!!

The lyrics talk about having that new single girl swag...and I may not be newly single, but I am VERY newly swaggering about it. My friends and roommates have been dropping like flies into relationships in the last few weeks, and I've been feeling very lonely and desperate to have someone lately...but after spending all day with my BFF today, and thinking about everything a lot more...I couldn't be happier to be single. I like being free to do whatever I want with my time, I have a lot of studying to do, and I really don't want to be dating someone just to be with someone, and not be alone. I don't like the girls who do that, so why would I do it?

I am single, and I can now honestly say that I love it. If someone wants to date me...they can ask me out, I'll go on a date or two with them, and if things work out, great. but it will be because we both like each other. not just because we're both single, and I don't want to be alone.